So, readers, I spent all this time (insert sarcasm here) coming up with a great idea for a poetry contest, and instead everyone decided to post comments about the fact that I am holding a poetry contest without actually posting any poetry.
This does not make moi happy. I thought I would come home from work, open up my blog, see all this lovely poetry, and be prepared to pick a winner...sigh.
Maybe it's because I didn't pick a prize for the winner. I think I have an Applebee's gift card laying around I'd be willing to pawn off. However, I think the better prize would be to be a guest poster on my blog for a month. I know, I am so generous and the winner will be so privileged.
So please people, amuse me, write something. Anything. Shit if you can't even do this I don't think I will post my long awaited "Mad Libs" next week! OH yes, I was really gonna do it! Yeah enough about this.
In other news...Scott decided that he wants to file a class-action lawsuit against the TSA because they let First Class passengers go through a separate (i.e., shorter) security line while all the hacks in coach have to go through the long, regular line with pissy TSA screeners. I like this idea. Class discrimination I say!!!
Also, I saw a very interesting article that talks about how a new study of the Kennedy assassination seems to prove that there couldn't have possibly been one gunman. I know, conspiracy theories blah blah...but these were highly technical bullet tests and proved that the tests done back in the 60's were simply not valid. If you're super into the Kennedy shit like me, you'll find it interesting. Peak your curiosity here.
Whelp that is about it for today. Probably no post again until Sunday/Monday since I am heading back to the OH-IO for Kelly P's wedding. You know what this means--you all have time to work on your magnificent poetry skills. I suggest that you get horribly drunk and then start rambling some stuff off, and then just post it. That would be fun.
Have a happy weekend everyone!
Thursday, May 17, 2007
Le contest de poetry---WHERE IS YOUR LE POETRY?
Posted by MellyDoodle at 5:42 PM
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7 comments:
I vote for the applebees card as a prize... seriously u mine as well just give it to me when you get here saturday, cause i'm gonna win, oh and also we got till sunday at 5pm right? Have you lost it :)
Humpty Dumpty: A True Hollywood Nursery Rhyme
Before Humpty fell off the wall he had another fall. A tragic turn of events in Humpty’s life is what led to this heartbreaking story … The real story of why Humpty Dumpty fell off the wall. A True Hollywood Nursery Rhyme…
Before…
Humpty Dumpty had his great fall
Humpty Dumpty puked in a stall
Smashed in the bathroom full of women
Poor Humpty fell off the wagon again
Humpty Dumpty awoke still drunk
Humpty Dumpty smelled of great funk
Laying there wondering what happened last night
Humpty rolled over with a face full of fright
Then…
Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall
Humpty Dumpty had his great fall
All the King’s horses and all the King’s men
Couldn’t put Humpty together again!
It was obvious that Humpty was in pieces before this catastrophic event. And now all we are left with is this big if... that is… if all the King’s men would have reached out to put Humpty back together before his great fall, instead of after, then what could have been… however, we are only left to wonder.
Please join us next week to find out whose bush WAS the mulberry bush? And how it really made the weasel go pop! Only on True Hollywood Nursery Rhyme.
I wasn't sure where to post it... so I posted it in both your entries!
Melly, I know my entry is late, but I hope you like it!!!
Beautiful things, they come and go
I wish I could keep them forever to show,
How do I protect them when the harsh elements attack?
Why, preserve them with a thick coating of shellac!!!!!!!
(Mel, I hope the stanzas are in the same order as what I emailed you)
"High Gas Prices"
High gas prices really bite
They sometimes keep me up at night
Lord only knows how much it shows
But I still fill up without a fight
High gas prices are such a bitch
Somewhere, someone is getting rich
I can sigh - "I wish it were I"
Those Arabs we must ditch!
High gas prices really blow
To less places they let me go
But the more I bitch, I start to itch
So back to this damn poem I go...
High gas prices really suck
I laugh at the guy with the great big truck
As he fills his tank & drains his bank,
All he can say is "Fuck!"
And so my friends this poem is done
The battle for oil is not yet won
My bran's distraught & lack thoughts,
But I'll leave you with just one...
Life is all about gasoline
Yes I know, it's really mean
So next time you buy gas and take it up the ass,
Be sure you remember your vasoline!
Two corrections, in the next to the last stanza, there is a line that should read "My brain's distraught and lacking thoughts"
Yo, Mel - announce a winner already!!!
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